Four years ago (almost to the day), I remember sitting in a women’s Wednesday night Bible class about marriage. I am pretty sure I was the youngest woman there by a couple years. I was always a bit clammy and nervous, but eager to soak up the wisdom of these women I admired. Mitch and I had been married only a month. I’m sure we had that glassy newly-wed look in our eyes constantly. We both knew that we wanted our marriage to not only last, but leave a healthy legacy of love for our children someday.
Our church, East Hill, blessed us through one-on-one mentoring relationships with older couples during our engagement. We also had the opportunity to attend The Art of Marriage within two months of being married. But I digress. Let’s go back to this day four years ago where I learned a piece of advice I have never forgotten. In fact, I still have the tattered handout in the back of my Bible: “Become Your Spouse’s Publicist” by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott. The article’s main message was that our words matter. Not just the words we say to our spouse, but the ones we say about them. It referred a study that revealed that researchers could tell with 87 percent accuracy whether or not a couple would divorce based on whether they talked positively about one another, or were cynical with their words.
Our Words Matter.
Today, I was challenged to join a linkup by Bethany Miller at her blog Dandelion Pie. The theme? Bragging on the man in your life. How appropriate! I thought when I read it. (It was even more I amusing because we both posted on bragging today.)
The challenge is to share 10 Things I Love About My Man:
1. He fixed our toilet seat and hall light at 10PM last night. Our toilet seat broke the other day, and our hall lightbulb burned out. We had stopped by Walmart to remedy this earlier in the day, because having your butt pinched every time you use the toilet is not fun. Trust me. But we forgot the light bulb and bought the wrong size toilet seat. Argh. After realizing it was the wrong size (and with no prodding from me), Mitch changed back out of his PJs, drove to Walmart and bought what we needed. He came home and fixed it all before bed. He even cleaned out the dusty light fixture! Can you tell yet that my love language is Acts of Service?
2. He is dedicated to our spiritual, physical, and marital health. Since we were dating, Mitch has always been on board for ways that we could grow together. That has meant many things over our 7.5 years together (3.5 dating, 4 married). It has meant attempting to jog together. (We will both admit, that was not for us!) Reading books that feed our marriage. Cooking healthier meals. Going to marriage retreats. Most recently, he has been amazing on all fronts. He goes for a walk with me every day to keep me, our baby, and our dog Hazel healthy. A couple days ago, he had a great plan to help us bring more consistency to our reading and prayer time together: Scheduling it. Genius, right?! It is amazing what scheduling something can do . . . Now at 9PM every night we drop what we are working on and spend 30 minutes or so in prayer and reading together. He even agreed to reading the Bradley method book with me! Plus, he keeps us consistently studying the Bible together at least 4 times a week. Right now we are reading through the book of Proverbs over breakfast.
3. He makes the BEST oatmeal. My dear husband who doesn’t especially like breakfast or oatmeal, can make the best bowl of oats I have ever tasted! He cooks down steel cut oats in milk or almond milk, his special blend of spices, chopped nuts, and often adds fresh fruit like blueberries. Excuse my drool. Mitch probably does at least 50% of our cooking. Sometimes I am embarrassed to admit it, but I am truly blessed by his skills in the kitchen. Do you ever have those days where you feel uninspired or are living off leftovers? I do. But Mitch can always walk into our almost bare pantry and find something delicious! I am a bit jealous of his creativity. The best part? He enjoys it and never makes me feel guilty. You can check out his tomato-to-jar recipe for pasta sauce. We just had it for like the 100th time last night–it is SO good!
4. He is a visionary. Mitch understands the importance of having a vision. He has a vision for our youth and family ministry, but he also leads us, as a couple, in developing a vision for our marriage and future family.
5. He helps me unwind. I can get overwhlemed and stressed very easily. Worry is a natural state of mind for me. Mitch knows how to help me step back, gain perspective, find confidence, and move forward. He also teaches me how to relax (another thing I struggle to do). Did I mention he gives me killer foot massages even though he detests feet?
6. He is hardworking, yet he knows how to say “no.” If you read my post on the power of no, you know that I am bad at saying no and turning down opportunities. Mitch works very hard as a youth minister, and he cares deeply about the teens and their families. But unlike me, he is skilled at setting boundaries. I have never felt neglected by him. He always prioritizes our marriage and time as a family, something many ministers fail to do.
7. He is patient. Mitch doesn’t loose his cool easily. He is a patient man, not only with me, but with others. And if you know anything about working in ministry, you know it requires buckets of patience . . .
8. He embraces change and adventure. Some people have to know every detail. They are a pain to travel with. Mitch embraces change with peace by taking it one step at a time. He also has an adventurous spirit that I love. Some days we both just need to get out of town, see some wide open spaces, and breath in the scent of pine trees. Mitch is always on board. We don’t have to have a plan or destination. We can just pack up our car and go. Spontaneous road trips are one of our favorite ways to unwind and reconnect. 🙂
9. He is going to be a great father. Rebekah has not been born yet, but I knew within a month of dating Mitch that he would make an incredible father someday. He is gentle, patient, caring, fun-loving, and stinkin’ good with kids! The kids in Bible Hour at church love him. He is great at calming fussy babies. Many children think he makes the best jungle gym! Rebekah is going to be one lucky girl, simply because she will have an amazing daddy!
10. Every night he has my side of the bed “turned down.” Mitch knows me well. I get cold at night. I like a blanket up around my neck to snuggle with, and I like the added weight of extra blankets. The weight makes me feel secure. Without fail, every night he will spread out two extra heavy blankets on my side of the bed before I come to bed. Sometimes the best things are the little gestures that remind me on a daily basis how much he loves me. 🙂
So what are 10 reasons you love your man? Share some in the comments below, or write your own post to linkup at Dandelion Pie!
Also linked up at: FellowshipFridays!